I got this email awhile back and copied it into drafts. At the time, I was too steamin' mad to write anything about it, so I filed it away for later. I just found it in my blog drafts while I was going through them today. It still makes my blood boil.

The email said… (yes, I replaced the URL to protect the clueless)

If a sale is generated by an article, radio show, TV segment, or advertisement we directly place, no commission is due and may be reversed.

If COMPANY.com issues a coupon or discount to a customer during a promotion and it is redeemed, that will be considered a sale by COMPANY.com and no commission will be due any affiliate for that sale.

So to translate, I'm reading this.

You, as our affiliate, are in direct competition with us, the company. If we do anything to assist the transaction, you're not getting any of the money.

And, oh by the way, we don't appreciate you in the least. You might want to go look for someone else to promote. You're a nuisance and we'd rather you go away.

BOO, I say. BOO!

This reminds me of these two blog posts:

• How NOT to Motivate Affiliates, Pt. 1
• How NOT to Motivate Affiliates, Pt. 2

Warmly,
Nicole Dean

PS. If you want to know how to have an affiliate program that KICKS butt, excites your affiliates, and generates loyalty – you might want to make sure you're a member of IncomeCPR.com. Just sayin'.